In the spirit of more Sunday Inspiration

I had been encouraged by many people to watch the movie "Fireproof" with Kirk Cameron. The couples retreat at our church (which we couldn't attend unfortunately) focused around the theme of this movie. And strangely enough, I've been thinking about this long before I knew there was a movie about it.

I would like to see a movie about real marriage. Marriage that goes through a hard time and doesn't break up. Marriage that you fight for. How you choose every single day to make your marriage work, no matter what. I'm certainly aware that some marriages can't be fixed. Abuse, extramarital affairs, ongoing lies, prison time...I can see where some marriages are in extreme circumstances. But what about those that aren't facing a last resort - those that just THINK they are on their last resort?

The movie "He's Just Not That Into You" made me angry as I left. Spoiler if you haven't seen it: one couple (Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Connelly) married in college and seem to have it all. Then Bradley's character meets Scarlett Johnassen's character and instead of jumping right in, he hesitates. He says he's married, says they can't even be friends. I was rooting for the right decision the whole time. But no...he finally gave into temptation. He cheated, he admitted it to his wife, and even though she wanted to work on it, he didn't and then spent the rest of the movie bashing marriage and making it seem like a prison to all guys out there.

What about the REAL couples that face REAL problems: infertility, money/debt, parenting, job moves, children's activities, lackluster sex life, pornography, and the dreaded "I love you, but I'm not IN love with you" talk. I know people who have faced each and every one of these and have come out stronger in their marriage than ever before. There are people who have suffered from an affair and worked VERY hard and VERY long to build back trust and love and stay together because they made a commitment. Because they made a family and they promised nothing would come between them. What about those people? What about women AND men that want to be married, love being married, but just go through hard times?

"Fireproof" is that movie. What's great is that it's about a couple (they don't have kids yet) that basically they grew apart. Jobs and family situations overtook everything. They whined, nagged each other, felt disrespected, said hateful sarcastic things, and never put the other first. They were ready for divorce until a 40-day challenge called "The Love Dare" showed up in their mail and they went for it. They began to hold their tongue, say tiny positive things that eventually led to huge positive things. Gestures and listening and understanding and ultimately the realization is that it's not over. Neither wanted to live life without the other. It just took WORK to get back to that point.

Much like the book "The Shack", this movie I hope has changed me. I've been thinking about how I could recognize my marriage in a big way in that movie. Sarcasm, snapping at meaningless things, annoyance, distance, and in general I put myself before John and he has a tendency to do that as well. So I hope that one day he will watch the movie as well and recognize our cues. And we can work together to have a strong marriage that will last as long as my grandparents 60+ years (both sets!).

Anyway...just watch it. Especially if you're struggling with infertility because, take it from me, that is a time when annoyance, hateful comments, not listening, not understanding, and more can take a toll and actually destroy families before they ever get started.

But the real reason I'm writing about this is because the soundtrack....oh, the soundtrack...is beautiful. I highly recommend every song on there. I may talk about another song in the next few weeks, but today I am writing the words to a song called "While I'm Waiting". This, my friends, is for those of you in waiting. Whether religious or not, it's a humbling and haunting song. I wish I'd heard it during the time I was waiting. I hope you like it.

While I'm Waiting (click here to hear the entire beautiful song)
John Waller - Fireproof Soundtrack

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord

God is Faithful.

P.S. - My other two faves are "Slow Fade" by Casting Crowns and "Love is not a Fight" by Warren Barfield